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A few years ago, I was researching an article for The Rialto Report when I came across a 1980 radio program from WBAI, a popular New York City station that specialized in progressive and alternative voices at the time. This particular show featured a prostitute named Iris De La Cruz.
Iris wasn’t directly connected to the adult film scene in New York at the time – though she was friends with several of the adult performers – but I knew of her because she wrote for men’s magazines like Cheri, Partner, and Eros. Her monthly columns were an eye-opening account of her life working as a street prostitute, and this edition of the WBAI show was more of the same, with Iris talking about her experiences and then taking questions from callers to the station.
But the reason that I found this show compelling wasn’t just Iris’ connection to the sex business in New York in the 1970s. No, what was startling, jaw-dropping even, was that Iris had brought a guest onto the show, her ten-year-old daughter, Melissa, and was interviewing her in a completely unfiltered way about what she thought of Iris’s street-walking job.
Even for a program from 40 years ago on a counter-cultural station like WBAI, it still makes for a surprising, engrossing, but sometimes jarring, listening experience. In the current age of debate around parental controls, book bans, and school curricula, this frank, public discussion of sex work between a mother and young daughter is an exchange that probably wouldn’t, and couldn’t, happen today.
I listened back to the show several times – and each time, the same questions came into my head.
Who was Iris De La Cruz, and why did she expose her daughter to a potentially traumatic experience at such a young age
Who was Melissa, her daughter, and what did she make of this – would she even remember it today, or did it actually have any lasting effects?
And then, what happened to this mother and daughter in the years after this show was recorded – after all, Iris would likely be in her 70s today, and Melissa in her 50s.
I wanted to find what happened to both of them.
This is April Hall. And this is Iris and Melissa’s story.
This episode’s running time is 61 minutes.
Many thanks to Melissa De La Cruz for her participation and kindness.
Thank you to Veronica Vera for Scarlet Harlot and Aphrodite Awards photos. Visit Veronica’s site for more on New York’s world of sex work, art, and activism.
We never ask you for money or accept any advertisements for what we do, but if this story means something to you, we’d love it if you went to the Iris House website and considered making a donation, however small. We’re not associated with them in any way, but they do such good work and well… we know that Iris would be grateful to you. Thanks so much.
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Iris De La Cruz
Jean Powell, P.O.N.Y. spokesperson before Iris de la Cruz
Prostitutes of New York (P.O.N.Y.) newsletter
Sex worker rights activity Scarlet Harlot protesting down by Wall Street in downtown NYC
Aphrodite Awards hosted by Annie Sprinkle (middle) with Iris de la Cruz to her right
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Excerpts from Iris’ publication Kool AIDS On Ice
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Melissa De La Cruz
The opening of Iris House by Melissa de la Cruz and her grandmother in honor of her mother Iris
Early photo of Melissa and her grandmother, Iris’ mother Beverly Rotter
Iris House carrying Iris’ legacy today
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Awesome Article And Podcast Keep Up Good Work
Thanks Jeff!
I’m listening to this now and it is RIVETING!!!! Where do you find these amazing stories….. and keep them coming.
You are amazing.
Thank you so much Fabio!
I couldn’t believe me eyes when I saw this appear today: Iris’s story is a complex and inspiring one.
If anyone can do it justice, with all the nuances and contradictions, The Rialto Report can.
THANK YOU!!
We so appreciate that Barber John – thank you!
Love the raw honesty of the interview. It completely upended the previous narrative in the best way. Like another person commented, I was completely riveted by the entire podcast. It was Ambrosia in my ear holes and brain.
P.S. Jamie Gillis ❤️
Lovely to have another RR podcast. ANY RR podcast!!!!
Thanks Harry!
Honestly April, your skills as a journalist and storyteller are unrivaled in the world of podcasting.
There are a lot of idiots with a mic that talk to themselves for an hour hoping someone will listen.
Rialto Report is a stark exception, with its amazing, thoughtful and compelling stories.
Keep up the excellent work!
Thank you so much Todd – we really appreciate it!
Thank you and Brava April! Iris DeLaCruz has achieved practically legendary status because of her importance to PONY and the sex workers’ rights movement but so much of Iris own personal history has been missing – you’ve filled in some big gaps. Gratitude to Iris’s daughter Melissa and your interview with her. Melissa was able to speak the truth about her challenges – the fears, the terrors- as Iris daughter along with her love and loyalty. this is a rich, complex story. Iris comes out a hero, warts and all. This is an important piece in the documentation of the sex workers’ rights movment, for support of decriminalization, towards the betterment and enlightenement of society, and the support of sex workers lives. Good work on finding the clip about Jean Powelll, the original founder of PONY. In 1989 we reorganized PONY yet again and printed that PONY Express magazine. More on that era of PONY can be found on my .blog
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Thank you so much Veronica for this and for all the work you’ve done and continue to do for sex workers rights. People interested in this topic should absolutely visit https://veronicaverawrites.com/ for more!
Thank you April. 😢 and thank you Iris& Mellisa
Thanks Philip!
Thank you so much for this, April. It meant a lot to me to hear so candidly from Melissa, from your interview with her today.
I knew Melissa was parentified from the moment that WBAI excerpt began. I knew “sex work” was hardly the problem—everything else was! Iris’s narcissism, the way she almost lost her temper about the divorce, her need for Melissa to mirror, mirror, mirror. The druggie delusions. I knew Melissa must be on the blunt end of all that, but she “had to take care of mom.” She was an old soul, so young.
Man, do I know that story.
Melissa opening “Iris House” — incredible. …. Now to go wipe the tears away.
We so appreciate that Susie. We hope you’ll consider sharing Iris’ story with your audience – we’d love her legacy to have the reach it deserves.
Susie, your use of the terms “parentified” and “narcissism” really called to me. I’m in the middle of reading Moon Zappa’s new memoir, and she speaks of those very issues as being problematic in her own complicated relationship with her parents. Moon also discusses the malaise of too-young children learning certain aspects of sexuality from clumsily insensitive parents that are better left unexpressed.
April, great work! I am very inspired from this story and your platform concept podcasts. This one was special. Thanks RR for humanizing and educating towards the public. I am a returning listener and this one really hit in a powerful way.
We really appreciate that Christopher – thank you so much for listening!
A complex story – exquisitely told. No judgement, just a sensitive, empathetic presentation of the details… and most important of all: the respect for the audience to make up their own minds.
This is a tremendously sensitive area, and I am immensely grateful to The Rialto Report for being such caring and intelligent historians.
Thank you for taking the time to listen Fleur!
It is so gratifying that TRR isn’t confined to an exclusively fan-defined adult film history. Iris’ story would never have been published were it not for the desire of this site to focus on someone who is/was not the famous or glamorous person – but her story is every bit as important and relevant as the others.
Thanks to this incredible site.
We’re grateful for your note Claire!
What an amazing episode! This episode deserves an award. So moving and powerful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you Melissa for being strong at the heart of this sad yet uplifting story.
Thank YOU.
We are so grateful to Melissa for sharing her story with all of us!
What an episode. Well done April. Very emotional & so well researched. Bravo!
Thank you very much Karl!
This was fascinating, April! One of the best interviews I’ve heard on here! My heart went out to mother and daughter!
April. The piece is next level, beautiful. In my opinion, the instances where RR has pushed its own envelope have yeilded some of the most unexpected, and profound, works.
As a child who who experienced something very different and very similar myself, I am absolutely blown away by Melissa’s bravery and honesty. Thank you Melissa, if you are reading.
Thank You.